A couple of years ago, I was watching a program on tv and someone died (on the program). A female priest was asked to say something. I remember it was a female because at the time I thought it was wrong for women to serve as priests or preachers. I have since repented of that, but once in a while, my mind goes back to that time.
Back to the program. The priest read Psalms 139. I did not know that such a psalm existed and I loved it. It spoke to me. It was me. I felt God speak to me. Much as that tv funeral had upset me, it comforted me.
You have searched me, Lord,
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you, Lord, know it completely.
God is amazing. He knows everything. It scared me a bit, but it also gave me a sense of peace and comfort. Before I do anything, before anything happens to me, God knew it. Knowing that makes me feel safer, safe in that God was there before I got there. Therefore come what may, He has made a way out or a way through it.
You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
Would such knowledge amaze you too? It shocked me! My simple mind was simply awed!
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
🙂 Where indeed can we go to hide from his Spirit? When he has hemmed me behind and before and his hand is upon me?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
There is no where on this earth where we can go to hide from God. Trying to hide from God is a futile attempt. That is also a comforting thought 🙂 that there is nowhere where he cannot see us or have access to us. After all, the earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof.
If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
Even in our darkest moments, God is still there with us. Regardless of how dark and lost I feel, regardless of what pit I am in, for God, its as light as day. There is no place where he cannot reach me.
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
When my mother was expecting me, she would apparently spent her days at work telling her colleagues how she was going to love me and play with me. Every time I meet her colleague, she asks my mother if I am the loved one :-). I was an answer to my mother’s prayers. But I also know that a lot of children are not loved in the world, a lot are killed before they are born, some are thrown away at birth or as children. This chapter puts all of us on an equal footing. God knew about us way before we were conceived. Way before our parents were even conceived. No one is a mistake, to your parents maybe, but never to God. No one should ever tell you that you are a mistake when God knew you were coming and even knew when you were coming. Beloved, you are not a mistake :-).
How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.
How heartwarming :-). God is always thinking about us. So many good thoughts that we cannot number them.
If only you, God, would slay the wicked!
Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!
They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord,
and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?
I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
If only indeed.
Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Beautiful ending to a beautiful chapter. This chapter makes me happy. It is my ‘God is here’ anthem. It is my praise anthem! It is my life song. I am loved.